Aging Queen:

I am in a good mood, exited in fact!

After having been all alone for the last 25 days = over my birthday, Winter Solstice, X-mas, New Years and so on, my hubby Peter is coming home today! ♥

It had been a bit lonely at times, in spite of lots and lots of hard work – in in the Arctic temperatures – all the way down to -38 centigrade – and the lots and lots of snow = 2.70 meters in that time, the ice, the nasty storms, the power outages, the no phone, to call friends or neighbours… all that…….

But today late evening I will go down south and pick him up from the airport bus 🙂 

From the so called “Healing Tarot” I am drawing my card of the day:

The Queen of Pentacles:

 Q of P

She is getting her hair done – in a quite elaborate way.

The image gives me the idea, to also braid my hip long hair in a special and festive way.

I feel like the Queen of Pentacles , actually:)

Just so, and in spite of knowing better, I get out the Healing Tarot book and read the small print page about the QoP:

Queen of Pentacles for AT

Reading the paragraphs significantly dampens my exuberant mood.

Yes, it is true, there is my lingering and slowly worsening back problem – a broken vertebra that never really healed and now dances with arthritis….

Is that normal?

For a woman of 58 that was starved to skin and bones in a christian orphanage, far away from loving parents and subsequently had never quite managed to weigh more than 48kg?

Yes, wrinkles here and there and everywhere and with my physique they show. 😦

Reading this makes me feel ugly and old.

Will it help to braid my hair in a nice special way….

Yes, I HAVE to put myself first!

In terms of food – I can eat and afford to buy anything I want.

I had planned to go to the special deli with European foods in Barrie….

I know that I deserve a little treat after this lonely endurance test, but after reading this message it is not so much fun anymore……

I fell off my “happy” cloud…..

 

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4 thoughts on “Aging Queen:

    • Sure did!
      But, to tell the truth; this deck is not to my liking. I usually can find some redeeming thing/ factor, but this has made me depressed and sad soooo often.. 😦

  1. Wonderful, wise, Mi-Shell… Isn’t life too precious to persevere with, say, an uninteresting book or a deck which makes us miserable? That 58 year-old hungry child deserves a trip to the Deli!!! … And to have pretty hair… 🙂

    I think that, no matter what our actual belief system, most of us do mourn the loss of youth… Not always because we are attached to it (I, for one, would not revisit my youth even though I enjoyed it at the time!), but simply because living in a body that is fit, well and pain-free is easier than living in a body that is not!

    I’ve been reading of your various experiences, such as your visit to Nepal and your meeting with the family of, and becoming familiar with the life and power of, Nyima, That is such an amazing thing to experience. If your little child is put off food by the reading with that card and that deck, let her simply dwell in the space of Nyima.

    Many,many blessings to you, Mi-Shell. 🙂

    • Thank you for your Blessings!
      Yes, come to think of it, right now I am working with and through the new teachings received in Nepal and especially through this Spirit I encountered and that is now teaching me….
      I am reading up on it, journeying every couple of days and have sooo many questions… But THIS Tarot deck does not have the scope and depth to answer any of them. Ifff I reached for the cards, these inevitably got tossed back into the box. But my trusted Greenwood helped with quite a few insights….

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